I don't like these drugs that keep you thin

>> Friday, March 5, 2010

Ok, friends, here it is: the skinny on The Joshi Detox.

As the book cover says, this is a 21-day program (followed by a 'maintenance' period, where some foods can be added back in). The goal is to help your body become better at eliminating toxins, to return the body to an 'alkaline' state (apparently we eat too many acidic foods), and to get used to healthier eating habits. It's not specifically for weight loss (as there is no calorie counting or portion control), but it can have that effect. I don't actually have the book, so I'm relying on the internet for rules and recipes and things. All I have to do is stop eating and drinking the following 'toxic' items:
  1. Red meat
  2. Alcohol
  3. Coffee or tea (even decaf)
  4. Wheat, gluten, or yeast
  5. Anything processed or with added sugar, including chocolate, sweets, jams or spreads
  6. Dairy 
  7. Nightshade vegetables (tomatoes, potatoes, eggplant). Apparently no mushrooms, peppers, and possibly not zucchini or cucumber either, but I'm not clear on these. I'll just avoid them anyway.
  8. Fruit
  9. No artificially flavoured / processed condiments like ketchup, vinegar, mustard, etc.
  10. Most nuts 
And of course, absolutely, definitely nothing deep-fried.

Well that's depressing. How about a list of what I can eat? Yes!
  1. Fish (but no seafood or tuna / other large fish, due to mercury), chicken, and turkey
  2. Brown rice
  3. Eggs (up to 4 per week)
  4. Lentils, pulses, and seeds
  5. Tofu, soy milk, rice milk, etc.
  6. Plain yogurt, goat cheese, and buffalo mozzarella (thank jeebus)
  7. Honey
  8. Olive oil
  9. Herbal tea
  10. Lemons

And all the other vegetables in the world! like kale, and wheatgrass!

Other things:
  • I am to start mornings with a glass of warm water and lemon (I've tried this - warm water is gross)
  • Once a week, ingest a "liver detox smoothie" - a mouth-watering blend of grapefruit juice, water, olive oil, garlic and ginger.
Apparently there is a good chance I will be in physical pain for the first couple of days as all the toxins in my body rise to the surface and make me miserable. But THEN - oh, then - I will supposedly begin to sleep like a log, enjoy higher energy levels, and acquire a saintly glow.


My song for today: Phantom Planet - Leader. Yes, the guys who did the OC theme song! Remember how good the first two seasons were?
ah, youth...

3 comments:

tribalwaif March 8, 2010 at 8:32 PM  

So sugar's ok? Not only can I not eat some of the "ok items", I mostly eat what's in the "no no" list.... peppers, tomatoes etc. Mmm.

b March 8, 2010 at 8:37 PM  

no...no added sugar. Makes it really tough to eat packaged foods (along with no wheat / gluten)

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